Wednesday, January 25, 2012

On Proving Yourself

I took my friend out to lunch yesterday afternoon.  No big deal, just the lunch special at Applebees, but she was very upset about something and I wanted to treat her.

As we were leaving the restaurant, we passed the woman who fired me and the owner of the company I had been fired from.  I turned and smiled, calling out a friendly hello.  Even though I had been fired, I understood the need to do so.  I still don't understand why the person who created the situation has yet to be punished, but that's no longer my problem.  I am a bigger person, and I will be okay.

But it got me thinking...since I lost my job last April, I have been excluded from any function these people have been invited to-just in case they were to show.  As though I was the bad person, and my presence would make for an uncomfortable situation.  I am not a hateful person.  I've had nothing but respect for my former employers.  I even like them, to this day. 

Clearly, they don't feel the same way. 

I'm not one to handle judgement well.  If someone tells me I can't, I show them I can.  Since losing my job, I've been bombarded with people asking if I'm 'okay'.  They are concerned I'm not doing well.
I'll say this:  I'm not making the money I used to.  I don't have a steady income, and I'm wondering how I'm going to make my next car payment.  But don't you dare tell me I can't make it in this world in spite of that fact.

I'm a hard worker, and I know what it's going to take to make it doing what I love.  And I will, someday. 
Someday, I will prove to everyone that I have what it takes.  That I can do it, whether they believe in me or not.
The past couple of years have been overflowing with people who seem set out to get me.  They wait for my failure.  They want to see me fall.
But I know the day will come when I can look at those people, the ones who lied to me, who betrayed me, who tried to ruin me, and I will show them how wrong they were.

I hate to think that part of why I write is to prove others wrong.  But it is.  Even though I'm not getting paid for it YET, I'm doing exactly what I love to do.  And I WILL make it.  I will be the one who is happy, while they feed on the misery of others.

Has anyone ever told you you're not good enough to do what you love to do?  Have you ever proven them wrong? 


  1. Yep. I know what you mean. You will prove them wrong. Believe it. It will happen to you. I've had this happen, and you know what, I'm finally learning to turn that negative into fuel to my fire to prove them wrong.
    Love that quote. Keep writing!

  2. Thank you so much for posting this! I am feeling and going through the same thing and as a writer, yes, we are a little more dramatic but have the opportunity to see the world in a different light than others do and I wouldn't trade that for the world. Love your blog, it's awesome!

  3. Good for you! The world often seems so ready to beat people down. It's not always easy to stand tall and proud. I'm so glad you're continuing to do it!! :)

  4. Hey, I know I've been MIA for a long time now, but I am back! As for your question, I can't think of anyone telling me I couldn't do something. Sounds like you persevere through it though. I'm glad to see the job loss didn't affect you like some other people I know. Keep moving forward and never let go of your dream.

  5. I've always had people step on me, but I don't write to show them up. I write because I love it. And if people like what I have to say, they'll buy my books. If not, at least I have lived a life doing what I love.

    Be strong, because you are. :)

  6. I used to want to be successful at writing to prove to the people who didn't believe in me that I was smart and capable. But now I realize if people don't want to like me, there's nothing I can do to change that. I know that even if I do become successful, those people who said I couldn't will stay find a reason to look down on me.

    So now I write for me and want to be successful for myself and the people who believe in me.

  7. Christine-THANK YOU! I'm glad you found fuel for your fire. That's all we want, right?? :)

    Tracie-I agree with you! As writers, we're all a little more passionate and dramatic, but we would be nothing without it! Good luck to you, and keep your chin up. :)

    Jemi-Thank you! That means so much to me...

    Void-Welcome back! You've been missed. :) I hope all is well with you, and thank you so much for the kind words.

    David-thank you! I very much agree with you, it's just hard sometimes not to show everyone what you're made of just to prove a point. I am still writing for me!

    Rachel-Ugh, I know you're so right. No matter what I do, or how successful a writer I become, someone will always look down on me. Isn't that sad? Oh well. At least it's adding fuel to my fire and pushing me along, right? Thanks for the comment!