Friday, May 22, 2015

Making Time

I should just warn you up front...a lot of my posts are going to be about my kid and working around babyland.  Sorry...but not sorry.  Welcome to my new life!

When I first had Ava, I was overwhelmed with the responsibility of motherhood.  I didn't know how to control anything anymore, and I felt lost as an individual.  Don't get me wrong, I DID enjoy the frustrations of getting to know my awesome little girl, but for someone trying to make a living from home in the short time maternity leave allows, I thought more about what I WASN'T getting done in my money-making world.

I had been looking forward to a 'break' from a job that was suffocating me, and finding time to get back into my writing again.  Which unicorn did I fall off??
There was no time for myself.  I had no time to make a living.  And I definitely had no time to write anymore.  In fact, I had less time than I did before I had a baby.  Sixty hours a week in a stifling cubicle to a 24/7 mom gig had me in a state of panic.

I was sure I was going to lose myself amongst the spit-up, diapers, and constant feedings.  And naps?  They don't exist.  Who needs sleep?  Not my kid.  Or me, apparently.

But one day, I had had enough of this way of thinking.  I certainly wasn't the only mom dealing with lack of time to make a living doing what I love.  There are moms who have full time jobs, two jobs, no support systems, and they somehow find a way to write books and knit cute little hats and create, create, create!

Why couldn't I?

So I did the first thing I could think of to help me along the way.

I turned on my computer.  I opened a fresh word document.

And every time Ava would close her eyes for more than one minute, I wrote.

Yes, it's going to take a while.  But at least I know I'm trying, and slowly but surely, my pages will build. 
My maternity leave is almost over, and I'm trying like hell to figure out a way to be a mom working from home, but I'm confident.

I'll make the time to get it done.

Any working moms(or dads)out there struggling to be everything?
What have you done to pave your way?

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